Where is the evidence!?
(That you are who you say you are)

A short thread on core beliefs vs self-limiting beliefs

It contains:
A short-write up
10 journaling prompts

Beliefs are formed through experiences.

These experiences often root back to:

• Childhood
• Influences from others
• The interpretation of big life events

These beliefs can be enormously empowering once we recognise them.

It makes life simple - we move and act towards those beliefs and life becomes worthwhile, we act against them and we experience struggle and anxiety.

Similarly, beliefs can limit our potential.

It is important to identify and challenge these specifically.

To change/modify our beliefs, we need to first recognize them, before we can begin to question them.

We should then seek evidence that contradicts them (to navigate a limiting belief) or evidence that supports them (for empowering core beliefs).

This will likely feel awkward at first, but, over time, it will become more natural.

Changing beliefs is a process that requires patience and consistency.

To manage this, we need time to reflect, interpret the past, and look to the future.

To help you reflect on your beliefs, I have outlined some questions below:

To identify core beliefs:

1) What are some dreams that have stuck with me, and how do they reveal my subconscious beliefs and desires?

2) What are some irrational or superstitious beliefs that I hold, and why do I hold onto them?

3) What are some beliefs that I have about success and failure, and how do they affect my willingness to take risks?

4) When have I felt most alive? What was I doing?

5) What is my earliest memory, and how does it relate to my core beliefs? Why has that stayed with me for so long and what can I learn from it?

To identify limiting beliefs:

1) What are some beliefs that I have about the concept of "success," and how do they limit my definition of personal fulfillment?

2) What are some beliefs that I have about aging, and how do they limit my ability to embrace new experiences?

3) What are some beliefs that I have about work or career, and how do they limit my ability to explore new opportunities?

4) What are some goals or dreams that I haven't pursued because I don't believe I'm capable or worthy of achieving them?

5) What are some compliments or positive feedback that I have received but struggle to accept, and why?

Obviously, there are many other options, but I would suggest simply picking any one or two of these for now. Ideally, share your thoughts with a trusted friend or partner.

You can read the unrolled version of this thread here: https://typefully.com/_itsmrclark/i6ewoIz

Core Beliefs vs. Self-Limiting Beliefs: A Journaling Thread

The Sage knows many secrets.

Here is just one:

The secret to being irreplaceable?

Never waste your energy.

Do not force it. Simply go with the flow.

Why? [1/4]

Because efficiency is the language of evolution.

It is the key to ruling your environment.

The world favours those who use it with purpose.

You can only act with confidence when you have clarity.

Wasting energy = unclear.
Efficient = confident.

Do you hear that, Fool? [2/4]

The Fool's downfall?

Wasting energy by forcing what's not meant to be.

He is inefficient.

He is his own enemy.

This is exactly why he is a Fool!

Let's finish this. The Fool vs Sage - who is more replacable? [3/4]

The inefficient. That's who are replaceable.

I.e. The Fools.

The Fool wanders without purpose.

He never finds his place because he doesn't know what he is looking for. Don't be a Fool.

The Sage, however, is irreplaceable. He acts according to nature.

He rules his world [4/4]

The Sage's Secret to Being Irreplaceable

Anger

A Beacon for Hope (If Attended To)

If you want to re-frame anger more positively, these next ~35 seconds of reading may be of interest to you...

Anger: otherwise known (and felt as)...

• Disappointment
• Rage
• Impatience
• Despondency
• Loneliness
• Betrayal
• Violation
• Injustice, and so on

These emotions share something in common...

They are triggered by situations that challenge our commonly held beliefs and expectations.

We might hit an unexpected obstacle, feel disrespected, or have unjust criticism thrown our way.

These can lead to emotions felt within the anger family.

Suppressed anger can lead to all kinds of mental, physical, relational, and lifestyle problems in the long run

So any experience of anger should be instead viewed as a calling sign.

A beacon to a better way of life.

A signal for change and transformation.

We need to first accept anger without judgement.

It doesn't have to be directed towards anything or anyone.

Instead of blaming another, turn inwards and reflect on which boundary has been crossed without you realising it.

This is vital!

From here, we can look to the future rather than dwell on the past, and spot these opportunities early.

Yes, this is difficult.
And yes, this is worth it.

Anger gives us the motivation to set healthy boundaries, assert our true needs, and give us motivation to act, as well as improving our communication.

Anger is a calling sign for you to become your true self.

It is not just a temptation towards destruction.

The Positive Side of Anger

PART III - LOWER LEFT

What is more important to you:

To see yourself as an individual?
or
To see yourself as part of a wider culture?

Let's analyse this!

But first, a recap:

Part I - the interior individual

• Subjective experiences
• Thoughts
• Emotions
• Values

Part II - the exterior individual

• Objective facts
• Behaviours
• Biological processes
• Observable

Part III - the interior collective

What the hell does that mean?

If you go to a country on holiday, chances are a few things occur immediately:

1) I don't speak the language
2) I don't know what the signs mean
3) People are acting differently + I don't understand their 'rules'
4) Everyone knows what the rules are but no-one speaks about them

This is a classic sign of a lack of understanding of the interior collective

It covers things such as:
• Language
• Customs
• Expectations
• Culture

We can only understand these from WITHIN

I.e. Learning the language, living in that country, understanding the art, etc

To understand myself or another, I need to use language

I need to then interpret the meaning of those words

It is no different here, except on a wider scale

To understand the customs, you must engage with people WITHIN that system

We could study the culture from the outside, but it would be missing something important

We could look at the great Greek columns, but it doesn't tell me anything about what it means to be Greek!

Understanding mythology can be a fantastic insight here.

Why?

The meaning of those myths can only make sense within the culture that it was created

It transcends beyond JUST ONE person

It is a SHARED story, a shared culture, belief and worldview

This is why the lower left quadrant is so important

It gets us beyond our individual viewpoint, and places us within a shared context and a shared history

I am whole, but I am a part

I stand alone as a full human, but I am a human that fits within a larger group

So, 3 quadrants down, and one to go

We have looked at what it is to be an individual - from the inside (1st person) and the outside (3rd person - scientific)

We have now seen the importance of culture, from the inside.

What does the outside of this look like?

You can read the unrolled version of this thread here: https://typefully.com/_itsmrclark/QSUwBmv

Individual vs Collective Self-Identity

PART II - UPPER RIGHT

Are you JUST your brain?

Is there more to you or is that it?

Part I focused on the inner world of our experiences
Part II will look at us as a mechanism - a scientific fact

But first, a reminder...

Part I - the interior individual

• Subjective experiences
• Thoughts
• Emotions
• Values

Part II - the exterior individual

• Objective facts
• Behaviours
• Biological processes
• Observable

If they are both about the individual, what is the difference?

Part I focused on the individual's experiences - what it FELT like to be sad.

This required a conversation to interpret the language

Part II focuses on the exterior of the individual - what is the brain DOING when you are sad

This requires objective scientific observation

I do not need to speak to you as an individual to learn this

I can observe the chemical imbalances in your brain

I can analyse your hormonal fluctuations

I can look at the surface of the brain, and ignore the depth of the language you use

In this view, the human is a 'thing'

It is a fact of science

It should be treated as such.

Studied. Observed. Objectified.

Empiricists love this view (i.e. Scientists)

Why?

Consciousness isn't a problem for this quadrant

It's just a fact or a by-product

There's nothing 'special' about it. There is no soul. Only what can be observed is 'real'.

We need only to map 'sadness' onto the brain and focus on that, says the upper right quadrant

Let's look at dopamine. And Serotonin. And ghrelin. And leptin. And so on...

We need to ask "what does it do?", not "what does it mean?"

This sounds heartless, I know, but this is just 25% of the puzzle

The right hand path = perception
The left hand path = interpretation

You can only interpret what has been perceived

Both paths are required

Just as we cannot reduce 'sadness' to a change in serotonin, we cannot magically produce 'sadness' purely out of a serotonin imbalance too

The same phenomena needs to be understood in different ways

We need to do justice to both elements, and not reduce one to other

So, we have looked at the individual from the inside (Part I) and interpreted values, thoughts and emotions.

We have studied the individual from the outside (Part II) and observed the brain states, chemicals, and hormonal changes.

Now, part III - the wider collective

Exploring Human Consciousness and Behavior

PART I - UPPER LEFT

Is it possible to write a book that combines all the thoughts of humanity so far?

Ken Wilber thinks so.

He separates human understanding into 4 quadrants.

Let's look at quadrant 1...

Firstly, two distinctions:

Inner vs outer
Individual vs collective

Combinations of these 4 give us the four quadrants

Quadrant 1 = interior individual

What does that mean in plain English?

Interior individual includes:

• Subjective experiences
• Thoughts
• Emotions

These are experiences from within.

We do not need to look at the brain to understand these (that's part II)

Is analysis useful here?

Yes, and no. Mainly no.

❌ Objective scientific analysis
✔️ Subjective interpretation

We cannot locate 'sadness' in the brain.

To understand 'sadness', we have to speak to the individual.

We have to engage in a dialogue with them.

We must INTERPRET the meaning...

We cannot reduce 'sadness' down to chemical imbalances

That is an important part of the picture, but it is not the whole picture.

We need to embrace the integrity of what it FEELS LIKE to be sad.

Scientific analysis can come later on...

Instead, we need to:

• Introspect
• Engage in a dialogue
• Interview and interpret

We cannot know what others experience without first asking them

Just as you cannot cut open my brain and see my values.

You need to speak to me to figure them out

I am a subject to communicate with.

I am not an object to study.

That is the motto of Quadrant 1 - the interior individual.

"What does it mean?"
"How can I interpret this depth?"
"What does this value/emotion mean?"

These are great starter questions

Is this all that there is to humans?

Interpretation and no object fact?

Absolutely not.

And that's what part II is about - objective individual behaviours and processes

Ken Wilber's Four Quadrants: Part I - Interior Individual

Have you ever been frustrated by the mismatch between the image you have of someone and their actual behavior?

It's super common.
It leaves us confused and disappointed.

So what to do...

We might try to manipulate the person.

Make them fit into our preconceived ideas of who they should be.

But here's the thing:

We're projecting our own unconscious desires (and archetypes) onto that person.

Why is that a problem?

Well, ...

We're not actually seeing them for who they are

We are seeing them as a reflection of ourselves.

Don't focus on what you can see, but rather on the eyes which are looking

The first step in breaking free from this cycle is to recognize our own projections.

This allows us to then question what we are seeing in the other person.

This can be a difficult, but it is necessary.

We must confront the gap between our fantasies and reality.

Why bother?

...because it is liberatation!

We come to see the other person as an individual rather than a projection of our own desires.

How freeing is this!


We can learn of the nature of our projections and the role they play in shaping our relationships.

I am inseparable from my relationships.

Learning about others is to learn about ourselves.

They are the same.

From here, we can also start to differentiate between our true selves and the archetypes that often speak through us.

But that is a conversation for another time.

Until then, notice what you are projecting onto others, and interpret their behaviour through this lens.

You can read the unrolled version of this thread here: https://typefully.com/_itsmrclark/jGFv7GK

Projection & Perception

The formula for overcoming that negative voice in your head.

Adapted from an @AlexHormozi video (linked below)

Readable in 37 seconds.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JfbtySq6_B4&ab_channel=AlexHormozi

I love this idea.

So here's an adapted version I use with my students.

It can be useful for:

• Confidence
• Anxiety management
• Imposter syndrome

And a million more things.

Let's begin...

Self-doubt can be a very limiting problem.

For every ‘good’ thing that you say about yourself, there are multiple ‘bad’ things that follow it up that immediately discredit everything that came before it.

It is in the inversion of this process that transformation can occur.

By inverting this, you get the ‘formula’ for overcoming limiting self-talk.

'Diminished' BUT 'Amplified'

Think of an area in your life where you are facing a block.

Examples:
• Work
• Relationships
• Family, etc

Or it could be based on other factors, such as
• Anxiety
• Doubt,
• Imposter syndrome

It could just be a barrier that you know is there, but you can't quite grasp.

Whatever your situation is, write out the problem first in the less empowering way.

It will look something like this:

"I want THIS to happen..." BUT "This is getting in the way…"

Then, using as much of the same wording as possible, invert the sentence. (Reverse it)

It will look something like this:

"I know these are the problems…" BUT "Here's what I am good at/could do…"

Look back over your sentence/s and notice how they land differently.

How is your thought process different?

To what extent does the problem feel more manageable?

What have you learnt about yourself in writing this?

Has the emotional weight of the issue increased, decreased, or stayed the same?

Tune in to each of these questions in turn.

See what they reveal.

And that's it!

Personally, I'm a big fan of this video and I believe it stretches way beyond sales.

See how it works for you!

The Formula for Overcoming Negative Self-Talk

🦺 Playing it safe?

👀 I see you.

Want to start taking risks?

Don't know where to begin?

Start here...

🔽 🔽 🔽

We must all learn how become more willing and experimental when it comes to taking risks, but...

We need to learn how do this in non-overwhelming ways.

How?
❌ Taking big leaps infrequently.
🏅 Taking small incremental steps often.

But why is this second option beneficial for us?

Small frequent risks allow us to learn.

Through learning, we can reflect.

In reflecting, we notice patterns.

So, we can adapt & make corrections whilst risking very little.

Risk -> Learn -> Reflect -> Notice -> Adapt -> Repeat

This links to the idea of 'Positive Black Swans'

I came across this idea in Nassim Nicholas Taleb's work.

It is when the upside of an event enormously outweighs the potential downside.

So...
• Abnormally huge positive (if it works)
• Extremely small negative (if it fails)
• Allows for lots of experimentation

Now...

Let's get practical.

Answer this:

In the past 6 months, what is a risk you took that paid off? How did you make it work? Now, how can those same principles help you take small risks and win big in the future?

✏️ Not a big writer?

🖼️ Use this frame to help:

· One risk I took in the past that turned out well was...

· Looking back, I realise that what made that risk successful was...

· If I could go back and do that risk again, I would...

· The lessons I learned from that risk are...

You want more? Sure!

· One small risk I can take this week is...

· The worst-case scenario if I take this small risk is...

· If this small risk pays off, it could lead to...

I think that'll be enough for now.

So, to summarise:

🔹 Small risks, done often
🔸 Learn from them
🔹 Reflect and notice emerging patterns
🔸 Adapt your next action/s accordingly
🔹 Repeat and experiment

😍 Small incremental steps
😠 Huge infrequent leaps


You can read the unrolled version of this thread here: https://typefully.com/_itsmrclark/OajBxLY

The Power of Small Risks

The honest man speaks for truth, not for self-gain.

His focus is on speaking with the right intention and without deceit.

Honesty, then, is a way of being.

It is a lifestyle, not merely an act.

Within honesty, lies clarity. Within clarity, lies confidence...

Therefore, to act confidently is to act honestly.

Without clarity, we cannot see what to do through the haze of uncertainty.

There are endless potentials, but very few specifics.

The haze may at first seem comforting as it is not divisive by nature.

It is not clear when we have failed due to the haze, so it helps to protect egos when we fall short.

However, it is also not clear when we have succeeded.

This purgatory is a breeding ground for anxiety.

The honest man, then, is also a courageous man...

One who is willing to let his beliefs die instead of him.

One who is willing to be wrong and seeks out these experiences that prove he is wrong.

One who embraces his role as the fool as this embarks him upon the journey of becoming the wise old sage.

The honest man bravely wanders into the haze with the intention of clearing it.

He likely does not know how to complete this job, but this doesn’t faze him.

His job is to take one step into the haze. Then another, then another.

It is not to plot out every single step first.

His end goal is always in mind: to remove the haze of dishonesty despite the risk to his self-image.

This is why courage goes hand in hand with honesty.

Honesty may unveil a dragon in the fog, but courage then reaches for the sword.

Would you prefer to walk towards the dragon unprepared?

I cannot answer this for you, but the honest man knows the answer in his heart.

And so, with fear, the honest man stumbles forwards.

For fear is a pre-requisite for the journey, not a problem.

Honesty breeds clarity. Clarity breeds confidence.

Confidence breeds courage. Courage breeds fulfilment.

If fulfilment is what you are seeking, look first at cultivating honesty.

You can read the unrolled version of this thread here: https://typefully.com/_itsmrclark/qqmTm0S