Have you ever been frustrated by the mismatch between the image you have of someone and their actual behavior?
It's super common.
It leaves us confused and disappointed.
So what to do...
We might try to manipulate the person.
Make them fit into our preconceived ideas of who they should be.
But here's the thing:
We're projecting our own unconscious desires (and archetypes) onto that person.
Why is that a problem?
Well, ...
We're not actually seeing them for who they are
We are seeing them as a reflection of ourselves.
Don't focus on what you can see, but rather on the eyes which are looking
The first step in breaking free from this cycle is to recognize our own projections.
This allows us to then question what we are seeing in the other person.
This can be a difficult, but it is necessary.
We must confront the gap between our fantasies and reality.
Why bother?
...because it is liberatation!
We come to see the other person as an individual rather than a projection of our own desires.
How freeing is this!
We can learn of the nature of our projections and the role they play in shaping our relationships.
I am inseparable from my relationships.
Learning about others is to learn about ourselves.
They are the same.
From here, we can also start to differentiate between our true selves and the archetypes that often speak through us.
But that is a conversation for another time.
Until then, notice what you are projecting onto others, and interpret their behaviour through this lens.
You can read the unrolled version of this thread here: typefully.com/_itsmrclark/jGFv7GK
Mr Clark 📝
@_itsmrclark
Helping to normalise difficult conversations through philosophy. Teacher, coach and bibliophile. Also, a lover of extreme music.
