I asked 30 women out in 30 days

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I asked 30 women out in 30 days. Made me a dating superstar. Here's what happened (and why you should try it):

Dating is a circumstances game and a numbers game. When you meet someone, you need to be: • Attracted to each other • Compatible • Available (single, hopefully) • Emotionally-ready Most of the time, at least one of these is out of alignment.

I read this argument in a men's magazine. How the editor tried it. He landed 8 dates after asking once a day for a month. . Biggest factor in getting dates is math, he said. I like math, I said.

After the biggest breakup of my life, I hadn't been on a date in months. (A lot of months.) I was emotionally ready to date again. But I was too shy to put myself out there. I tended to back off rather than face rejection. So I decided use the 30-day challenge as motivation.

Let me pause and say: This challenge works. I recommend it to anyone with the guts to try. (And I defy anyone on twitter to hit my success rate.) But before I share my results, here are some profound lessons I learned.

🔸 Zero fear of rejection After the first few attempts, getting rejected was just part of the process. "Who should I get rejected by today?" I stopped being worried about people saying no. What was more important was that I tried.

🔸 Best pickup line Any attempt at a pickup line was always awkward and immediately regretted. "How's your day going?" was the best way to get a conversation started. People like authenticity. I could save the stupid one-liners for later.

🔸 People are friendly I met a lot of nice people. Some had boyfriends, or just weren't interested. They were still happy to talk to a friendly person. Because I was polite about it, nobody was offended. They were flattered to feel attractive.

🔸 Went outside my race Uncomfortable, but sharing anyhow: I'd only ever dated white or latina. I was intimidated by perceived cultural differences. The challenge led to the first time I asked out an Asian girl. (And the 2nd. And so many variations on this theme.)

🔸 Attraction is a vibe There's a dance. You look at each other. It tickles your insides. You feel it. Early in the challenge, I hadn't done the dance. I just walked up to hot girls and asked. Build anticipation first. Let it percolate.

I learned a lot, but also had some bloopers. A few illustrations of how not to ask people out:

"Hi, I saw you over here and thought you were attractive. Want to go out sometime?" "No thanks." "Okay. Talk to you later!"

"Hey." "Hey." (Awkward silence.) (Still silence.) "So, I felt like maybe we had a connection. You want to go on a date sometime?" (More silence.)

(Her Friend) "Oh, it's that guy again. Hi guy." (Me) "Yeah, I came over to ask out your friend, but she's been on her cell for like half an hour." (Her Friend) "Yeah, she's talking to her ex." (Me) "She over him?"

Okay, Its results time. How'd I do? 30 attempts to get dates. How many said yes... (dramatic music surges)

. 0 dates. . ZERO. . But here's what I got instead...

I asked 30 women out over 30 days, got 0 dates, and it still: • Obliterated my fear of rejection • Built a daily habit of talking to attractive people • Broke my fear of dating people not in my social group • Improved my self-confidence 100% worth it.

I went on to eventually get dates. Lots of them. Too many. At a few points, I had to keep notes on all the people I was (ethically) dating at the same time. It got overwhelming. I had to slow my dating down and stop asking everyone out all the time.

If you're single and get rejected, it may not have to do with you. There are circumstances. Numbers. But keep putting yourself out there. (Yes, work on yourself, too. It's attractive.) And if you found a good match. Congratulations.