Bad feedback: No one likes hearing it, but it can be a massive growth vector if you know how to channel it, and act on it. I've Here's what I've learnt re: feedback, and how to get better at taking hard, raw feedback that made me feel awful (1/n)
1/ Listen hard, it's high fidelity signal: Thinking of feedback is hard, and a lot of work on behalf of the feedback giver - its very high ROI to listen to it. Limit yourself to two phrases 'Thank you' and 'Tell me more'. Do not react in any way. If it helps, force a smile.
2/ Separate understanding feedback from addressing it: It's tempting to jump straight into addressing feedback. Avoid doing that - listen, reflect, internalize and see if it's feedback worth taking. You don't have to 'close the loop' on feedback
3/ Getting zero feedback is not the goal: Early in my career I thought no feedback = I'm doing well. If you aren't getting any feedback, you're being as unobjectionable as possible and succumbing to the pull to the mean. Thats means you were not bold enough to take a stance
4/ Keep probing for more feedback: When people start delivering feedback, they're uncomfortable. Smile, say 'tell me more', and egg them on. The best feedback will come through if the giver feels comfortable and can continue talking for 5-7 minutes. Ask for examples if required
5/ Proactively seed the hardest feedback: Sometimes you know you've messed up or done wrong. In such situations, proactively seed the hardest feedback such as 'Hey I heard X, do you think so too?' This will help people open up, diffuse an awkward situation and help you grow.
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